Hello my sweet Tumblr friends. I’ve been away, and I need your good vibes more so than ever.

A quick update: I was recently hit by a car while on one of my many liberating, empowering runs. I’m fine, just broke my tailbone- but what it’s done to me in terms of perspective is quite phenomenal. Add to this the fact that ‘Legends’ served his purpose and is now gone. An end in unfortunate bad terms, his deception/his loss- my gain during our time and I am better for it. I recognize and for this I am thankful.

Music remains my constant- aside from fitness which is on pause right now. But, I promise to myself not to run, hide from feelings, to live and continue loving and believing, living ‘balls out’ - it’s the only way to live, my friends, to feel we’re really, truly alive. Stay tuned for more poetry, more music, more prose & more love. Let’s live a life of abundance, yeah! - xoxo I missed you! - haven ;)

Tenderly they gaze
And as quick as the last embrace
They let go in fear
There could there be more
But who wants to know?
Who dares to go?
Might it be easier then… to forego

Yeah, she goes

The game is juicy
And he claims to lead
She’s so far ahead
Watch it, baby, lest you carelessly bleed

And on, he goes

Every now and again they slip
Into a rhythm so familiar and comforting
That neither wants to admit
So one clutching and the other gripping
This obvious connection they begin to omit

For now, on, they go

It’s a game he’s mastered
And as fun as it is for her too
It is his to lose
She will prove

And in the end they will their separate ways go
It was a game nonetheless
But both a true love let go

-haven

So when I started HavenStory a little over a year ago, i was down in the dumps and music uplifted me to no end. I made it my quest and journey to find new bands, artists, remixes of songs, etc. Fast forward to now and, well, I am pretty much still down in the dumps, but I have exhausted my time and priorities between friends, dating and of course work/career, things that are helping me cycle out of divorce land into new me land. Not much time is left to discover new music, sadly, sadly so. So in the interim, i shall change my tune: HavenStory will remain a blog about relationships first and foremost, a blog with the occasional poem, and the occasional song. But i don’t want to mislead you, baby, that this here is a music blog. It’s just my words interpreting feeling, sometimes in pure coherence, sometimes in pure pain, nothing but the raw. But, i will always, always, strive to be positive and shed that light in my posts, writings and well, everything around me… because the world is so beautiful, and I am blessed to have the people i do in my life, blessed to be on my own and explore the never ending possibilities of me and really just life. Cheers, my Tumblr friends! Have you uplifted someone today yet? I promise you will feel better for it, go on: Love someone, admire someone, respect someone today and again tomorrow and so on ; ) xo -haven

This blank page stares at me
Taunting
Daring
“Write bitch
What have you got?
Poetry you call it?
Get on with yourself, girl
Write me a sonnet
About how you were betrayed
Write me a love letter
About the lover you met
Write me your sorrows
Your dreams
Your intentions
You sadly forlorn remain
And I here this blank page
Stare at you not in disdain
Not in disdain
But a blank page
For you to maim
Or possibly a life reclaim
Yeah, a life reclaim
Yours
Today, you took all the right steps
And here we are
You writing
You dreaming
You loving
Yourself and others
Opening up to for once loved be
Without trading anything in exchange
Just a little ‘ol blank page staring at you
No longer blank
Thankfully
Lovingly
Because of your courage
To spill it
Like only spilled ink
And raw emotions could”

God, what would this year have been
Without Tumblr
Without words
Without friends
And the courage you mustered
The hills you climbed and hiked
The iron you pounded
to shape your body
And thereby your mind
Your soul
To feel like only a superhero could
And yet your heart for now remains frail 
But your friends and loved ones ready to the avail
And I hear you say loudly and purely:
“Thank you blank page,
Thank you my friends,
Thank you my pretty strangers,
Who if only momentarily you have made me
On a high feel
Thank you God,
Thank you mom,
Thank you me,
For picking myself up
And matching emotions to words
Feelings to laughter
And broken dreams to hopes”

Here’s to 2012 and baby, baby
To so, so much more!

-haven

(Art “belle monde” via bookspaperscissors)

You didn’t ask
So
I didn’t say
Sorry, was it my
responsibility
And did I
Lead you astray?

You didn’t know
Or so you claim
That I was falling
As hard as you
But I’ve been hurt
And I retreated
You left me no choice
And I had it in me
To walk away

You had it in you
To express
Your words perfectly
Matching your feelings
As I fucked-up like a soldier lain
And I was a rebound or so I suspected
And so this guard of mine tough like concrete remained

Meanwhile you were certain that I was
The one who got you,
And I did
That one who refreshingly sought you and
Special made you feel
And I wanted to, and so I did
But, I needed that too.
You gave it,
But this fucked state of mine
couldn’t see it- even if the awakening was so fucking rude

I fucked up
I miss you
But you needed more
Than I could give you
And I am not sure that
Even writing this
I could enough give for us two

What next, baby?
Do you have it in you
To grow this out and love
me unconditionally?
I’ve done it,
And I know that I with you too can
Will you simply lie by me?
Share your dreams?
And contently hold my hand?

Time is all I need,
but not alone.
I want you by my side
Just understand
It will take a bit more
To let this guard down
And let go
And when I do, baby
This world of ours,
This world of yours
I will be your lover,
Your biggest fan
And adoring admirer

Please give me some time,
but don’t for a minute-
Don’t for a minute
Leave my side

- haven

(Art “Episodes” by Grzegorz Domaradzki via Marysoul )